Saturday, June 15, 2013

Mind Your Own Grocery Cart. Thanks.

It's inevitable. At least 9 out of 10 trips I make to Aldi, either the person right in front of me or right behind me in line has some sort of comment about the amount of food in my cart. The comments range from simply incredulous to flat-out snarky, but they are always irritating because. . . really? Why do you care? OK, if I was just running in for laundry soap I might not want to be stuck behind me either, but that's what you get for not planning ahead. If you were nicer, I might wave you through to go ahead of me.

I really don't think I'm getting all that much food.  Maybe that's just because I've been grocery shopping for 5+ people since 2007 and the idea of one box of Cheerios lasting more than two days is a total joke. Maybe it's because we just don't eat out much (twice a week on an indulgent week) and everyone else at the grocery store is just shopping for the one meal a week they don't eat out for. Maybe it's because I really hate grocery shopping and refuse to go more frequently than every other week while other people are totally content going there every two or three days. Whatever the case, if you think what I just bought at Aldi is alot, you should have seen the 2 loads of milk, cheese and produce I lugged to the car from the farmer's market yesterday.  Or the ENTIRE FREAKING COW in my freezer.

But I just don't get why people feel the need to comment on what's in my cart. I suppose some of them are just trying to be friendly.  But that's just really weird small talk. I'd prefer a comment about how nice it is out or something. How am I supposed to respond to someone with 4 boxes of Pop Tarts and a couple 2L of soda saying, "Wow! That's alot of fruit!" or a strange old guy asking "How many kids do you HAVE?" or today's hurried and impatient middle-aged woman (who happened to be IN FRONT OF ME in line) stating, "It looks like you'll be here a while."

There is simply no real way to respond to these comments, so I've started responding in ridiculous and/or conversation stopping ways. I'm usually not quick on my feet in those sorts of situations, but I have started a mental list of replies to these nosy and/or overly friendly people. A bonus is that the cashiers usually think it's pretty funny.

  • How many kids do you have in your house? I think I had 8 kids the last I counted.
  • That sure is alot of food! You should have seen how much I got when I was here yesterday.
  • Wow, that's a full cart! I hope it's enough. Did you know you burn over 2000 calories running a marathon?
  • How many people are you feeding? Just me.
  • Didn't forget anything did you? I think I forgot one of my kids back in the dairy section, but that's ok.  I'll just buy another next time I'm here. 
  • Wow, you must go through alot of fruit in your house. Not really. I'm just a theater critic.


  1. This takes me back to shopping with my mom. We did the two cart thing at Giant Eagle. Funny moments came when one of us would hold a spot in line only to be join by another overloaded cart just as you thought we were finishing.

    On the flip side, nothing was better than seeing the jealous faces of the lone thanksgiving day shopper when my mom came in with a small army of bag boys. We'd be thru that checkout line so quick you'd think she hired us.

  2. I wish I could go every other week but I don't know how to make fruit and veggies last that long. Already the strawberries I got last week are going moldy. Or deli meat. I get paranoid. Plus I don't think there would be enough room in the refrigerator. And there are somethings that I hate when they get riper. Like bananas. I can't stand the texture of really ripe bananas. I have a love hate relationship with farmers markets - I'd love to go to them, but hate that when they're open I'm either at work or asleep. Who's brilliant idea was it to do like 80% of them from 4-7 pm on Thursdays??