Wednesday, November 09, 2011

The strange things mothers say

Please feel free to add your own. . .

Here are some things I've found myself saying and hearing lately.  For kicks you can tryto figure out which child each of these pertain to. It's really fun if you imagine that there are several of these that it would make sense to apply to my husband. . .

  • Let us attempt to maintain some shred of civility, please.  That means pull your pants up.
  • Because it's rude to "do karate at" your mother, that's why.
  • Don't say "ass".  But you just said, "ass." Well, I shouldn't.  Does that mean Daddy shouldn't say "ass" either? You're right.  Daddy shouldn't say "ass" either. Someone better tell him that.  He likes that word.
  • Please take the tutu off the dog.
  • No, you may not have marshmallows for dinner.
  • What did you learn in Sunday school today? David was a sneaky little fart.
Edit, 11/9, 8:48 PM: From my friend "Max":
  • Stop touching eyeballs.
  • Cats don't have pockets. Why not? Because they have nothing to put in a pocket. Why not? They're minimalists. What's minimalanimalissas mean? That means they don't beg me for more Legos.

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